Odie the Roadie: More Florida Learnings...

#1. Kumquats. What deserves to be named 'kumquat'? Well, I figured if the locals get so excited about a kumquat that they have a huge, annual festival to celebrate the kumquat then it must be something fantastic, right? Let me just say that as a dog I will eat pretty much anything...yes, even really disgusting things (and you all know what I am talking about). I ate my first and last kumquat on that fateful day. Blech. Aaauuuggghhhh. Bbbbllllaaaach. Those cute little fruits that look like miniature oranges are not good eating - unless they are mixed with lots of sugar and whipped stuff and poured into a chocolate pie crust! And I am pretty sure that Paul would agree with me 100%.

#2. Sunglasses. For dogs. Really? If dogs were made to wear sunglasses then we would have been given opposable thumbs and better ear cartilage so we could at least put them on and keep them on without little elastic straps under our chins. We were not meant to wear sunglasses. Ever. I don't care if this is the 'sunshine state'.

#3. Swimwear. The important thing here is to have comfortable swimwear that doesn't rub or cause chafing because the combination of sand and salt can be very abrasive. When strolling the beautiful Florida beaches it is important to look good. And you don't want bad tan lines either. Do you think this swimsuit makes my butt look big??

#4. The grass is not greener...and the sand is not whiter. We did a 3-beaches-in-3-days tour looking for the perfect beach and discovered that the beach we had been going to all along was absolutely the best. I'll admit that I had high hopes for the pet nude beach (ok, in dog terms that is the leash-free beach), but it just didn't measure up. It was pretty funny watching Paul and Jeannie try to play bocce ball there - random dogs would trot over and take the balls every time Jeannie threw a fantastic point! Tee-hee!

#5. Nature meets technology... I already told you about the bald eagle that has been scoping me out and trying to chase me down in the hood. Well, I found out where he lives! With his wife and soon to be hatched babies. They are nesting in the cell phone tower a couple of blocks away. Unfortunately, that gives him a distinct advantage in watching my every move. He went after a vulture the other day - don't mess with that eagle - he means business! Maybe that also explains why my text messages get garbled (or maybe that is the opposable thumb issue again).

#6. Jeannie can still move pretty fast when she has to. How did I learn this?? First was the armadillo attack while walking in the dark. I, of course, went after something lurking in the bushes and when I got within a few inches - it turned and started to charge at me. I thought this looked to be a fun game, but Jeannie yanked my leash, reeled me in and pulled me backward down the street - she was moving!! But so was that armadillo!! Those little buggers are FAST when they are mad. The next day there was a gargantuan spider that jumped off the vacuum onto the tile floor and started running across the dining room. That woman had that vacuum plugged in, turned on and went from 0 -60 in a millisecond chasing that ginormous spider around the house. Score 1 for Jeannie - 0 for spider.